Essay: Core values (reflective)

Our values are the core beliefs that guide us when we have no sense of direction; at least this is what my mother used to tell me when I would get caught doing something she disapproved of. Alas she was right, but I won’t be telling her that anytime soon. The values that I hold most dear to me, even in times of despair, are: Commitment, Generosity, Integrity, and Self- Discipline. It doesn’t take a psychiatrist or even my overly involved mother to understand why these are my four core values. Out of my list of ten meaningful values, I knew that these would end up being the “last men standing.” The ten different values were in a way different variations of each other, and the final four values were the most boiled down examples of the list. All of these values represent what I admire in others and what I myself strive to be. According to the Values Assessment most of these are very positive values that suggest I am searching for meaning outside of myself, but there is one that suggests a selfish desire. I’m not offended by this assessment because I am by no means a Saint, but I am happy that most of my core values show that I am working towards something else. I have found that the values of commitment, generosity, and integrity are directed more towards the selfless side of the spectrum. On the other hand self-discipline can be seen as more of an inward focus. The Next Generation Service Core has four core values that all work towards a goal that lies outside of themselves, the program, and the students. I do believe that in a way all of my values represent the NGSC’s principles of Respect, Responsibility, Integrity, and Selflessness.
When I was five years old and begged my parents to let me quit recreational soccer they insisted that I stay until the season was over. To my parents it wasn’t fair to let the other children down by quitting, even though at the time it probably would have resulted in a better record for the team. I finished the season and actually ended up playing again the next year which made me fall in love with it; I played competitively from the time I was nine to the time I graduated High School. Had my parents let me quit I never would have discovered my love and passion for the game. I have carried that same mentality about commitment throughout my life and continue to do so. Commitment to me is about not giving up on the people depending on us and not giving up on ourselves. I believe that this core value has taught me how to survive in uncomfortable situations, follow things through fruishion, and be a dedicated friend and family member even in the lowest of times.
Without commitment to the team, activity, organization, or any group we choose to belong to; we can in no way truly respect them. We cannot say we respect something and then willingly abandon it when times are tough or we don’t feel like participating anymore. Commitment is also a very big piece of being responsible, if we feel committed to something we will take ownership of our part in it. If we want to become leaders we need people to look at us as though we are responsible and worthy of respect and we can’t achieve any of that without having commitment. Commitment to being respectful and responsible in any situation and role should be an integral part of taking on leadership positions, we shouldn’t want to be led by people that don’t see those as being vital ideals. NGSC’s value of respect and responsibility does align with my value of commitment.
Self-discipline is actually pretty similar to commitment, but takes on an entirely different  meaning to me. Over the course of my life self-discipline has appeared in positive and negative ways. It doesn’t surprise me that this is considered a “tier one” trait and has a somewhat negative and selfish association. I was very interested in dieting and working out excessively when I was only thirteen and I viewed it as having awesome self-discipline. Now that I’m older I realize that it was not a healthy type of discipline and in fact was dangerous, but it has also been a very positive value and force in my life. It took a lot of hard work and discipline to get to the point I’m at now, consisting of many late night study sessions and early morning exams. I was only able to accomplish what I did because of my value in self-discipline/determination, and I believe this trait will continue to help me accomplish many things. This value could be seen from the outside as being controlling and harsh in relation to myself, but without it I don’t think that I would have the same determination or will to succeed.
Having self-discipline has taught me a lot about being responsible and taking control over my actions. In college it’s very easy to get sidetracked and neglect our responsibilities but with self-discipline we can guide our priorities and act upon them. I have a responsibility to myself, my family, my friends, my school, this organization, etc., without a sense of self-discipline I could never balance all of this and do any of it justice. Responsibility is hard and I can’t honestly say I love how much of it I seem to have these days, but I still have it. I work my hardest and try my best to balance all of the spinning plates, but without self-discipline and a determination to succeed all of the plates would come crashing down. NGSC values a responsibility to others and to higher ideals and without the self-discipline to work hard we cannot fulfill that responsibility.
“Things could be worse”, how many times have we heard this over the course of our lives? When everything seems to be falling apart at the seams and all we want to do is scream, somebody always says this. As annoying as it is, it’s absolutely true. When I turn on the news -or look at my cell phone- the biggest news stories are typically always the saddest. From Syrian refugees to natural disasters, all around us there are people in much worse conditions than us. We don’t even have to look across the world or country to see this suffering, it’s often in our own backyards. Coming from a small town in New Mexico where the poverty rate is high and the alcohol/drug abuse is even higher, I have sadly seem some people in very desperate conditions. Unfortunately, this has become so normalized that many people don’t even realize how in need these people are, and I myself am guilty of this. Working in a food kitchen last winter gave me some much needed perspective, compassion, and sense of generosity. Generosity works on many levels; sometimes it’s organizing a huge fundraising event or sometimes it’s simply being a kind face. We are in a position to attempt to do both, we should strive to be generous in the big picture but also in our day to day life. I know that I can slip into a “me, me, me” attitude, but being generous is something that I continue to strive (and fail sometimes) to be everyday.
Selflessness is not feeling bad or guilty because of what’s going on in the world, it’s about actually taking action and doing something. Generosity is the act of giving to others, often times this is done in a selfless manor. Generous people are selfless, they act in a way that benefits other people. We have the power and ability to act generously and selflessly in small and large ways, everyday. The NGSC wants its members to be selfless in their lives and I believe that by being generous we are in fact being selfless.
Honesty, it’s the best policy. This is a rule that applies to classrooms, workplaces, games, relationships, every aspect of life. It obviously isn’t as easy to act in that way as it is to say it. Integrity is about being honest in the most difficult of situations; ones that may result in us getting in trouble or facing consequences, ones that may hurt other people’s feelings, ones that may be the most uncomfortable situations of our lives. When we choose to put integrity at the forefront of our lives, we’re choosing to be honest and open for our entire lives. NGSC has chosen integrity as one of their most essential values, and so do I. I’ve always believed that it’s much easier to deal with the potentially ugly and gruesome truth as opposed to pristine and pretty lies. However, I also believe that if we choose integrity over deceitfulness we won’t have to live in as an ugly or gruesome reality. We won’t be forced to lie to ourselves or anyone else about the reality of our situations and I think that’s a much better life than living in a made up one.
Our values shape who we are and sometimes that can be a good thing or a bad thing. As I’ve discovered through this assignment I am growing as a person, but I still have more selfish traits. I believe that many of the traits provided to us can be good in their own ways, just as many can be bad in their own ways. The assessment might have listed commitment, generosity, and integrity as more positive based values but they can have their own potentially negative effects as well. There have been situations that I have been taken advantage of and lied to because of my belief in commitment, generosity, and integrity. Just as the more negative based value of self-determination can be positive in its own way. Values can shape how we live our life but ultimately it’s up to us to decide how much of an influence they will be on us.